We live in strange times. Very strange. This is probably the
first time that I have had to leave the UK to return to Greece where things are
done in a strict and timely manner. It is the first time in years that my phone
rang rather than vibrated for a message; it was the government telling us that
we are all doomed, more or less. I am tempted to think that Voldemort is behind
it all. But I believe that we as Muggles will prevail! What we lack in toilet
paper, we make up in in memes.
Due to the current pandemic, whoever travels back from the
UK needs to self-quarantine for 14 days. Three friends and I decided to group
self-quarantine in a summerhouse altogether just to make sure we don’t die of
ennui before coronavirus. There are many benefits in isolating in a group of
four; first of all, there are more board games you can play. Our inspiration
comes from early university years, ranging from the coolest card game you could
play at the time, Tichu, to the
nerdiest game, Munchkins. And we’ve
topped up the games with a bit of alcohol to keep us going. The only downside
to this addition is that we have proven unable to master new games, such as Exploding Kittens. I tried explaining
the rules to my fellow playmates but they proved too drunk to follow.
Secondly, we can form two to four battlefields towards the
end of the quarantine and then not talk again for a while. Ideally, this won’t
be the case and this cohabitation will go ahead nice and smoothly. But if the
road gets rocky, I think we will go through enough rotations, alliances,
betrayals and quiet sulking to make Game
of Thrones appear dull and one dimensional. This will be live entertainment
in an unprecedented way. Problem is, I am not currently very wise in these
practices and possibly at a disadvantage. And have now publicly shared that for
my friends and future opponents to read. Darn it! But as the rest of my life is
put on hold, perhaps this is a good opportunity for a new skill set right out of
Days of our Lives. I will then be
ready to enter a reality show and flourish.
Thirdly, we have four different moms, who are in an unspoken
contest with each other about who can cook more food. We were ready to spend
our days with canned beans and hard candy, and instead we found ourselves with
meat pies and chocolate cakes. And about 15 phone calls per day to virtually
check our temperature, but it is a small price to pay for the aforementioned
delicacies. Greek moms are not content with just matching the caloric input of
another mom; taste, effort and technique are paramount. Then of course, there
is fruits and vegetables, which we are most grateful for considering pharmacies
have run out of our usual supply of manufactured vitamins. It is, however, much
more difficult to peal a kiwi than drop a Vitamin C tablet in a glass of water,
but such small challenges are what fill up our day. That and trying to get the
aforementioned moms to stay the fuck away so we do not partake in possible
contamination.
Lastly, what has been beneficial for the time being is the
societal pressure imposed by fellow humans. This societal pressure is what has
delayed our becoming cavemen (cavewomen in our case). We have had almost daily
showers. I have washed my hair once. One of us even shaved her legs. Deep down
I know that were I all alone, it would be very hard to get me back to normality
after two weeks of living like a 10-year-old boy without adult supervision. I
can’t help but imagine biting into a block of cheese like a bulldog and then
just drinking wine from the bottle to wash it down. That’s what 10-year-olds
do, right?
Well, it has been a few days, a few Skype meetings, a bit of
work, a bit of exercise, a lot of cooking, a lot of extracurricular reading, a
lot of worrying, a lot of memes, a few of them unrelated to the pandemic, so it
is much too soon to fully account our experiences as young adults in exile. Let’s
all hope that this gets resolved as soon as possible and we get our lives back,
however changed, and remain fortunate enough to have simply spent a few weeks
complaining about not having to wear a bra and sleeping more than we have ever
done before. Eye creams never worked as well as coronavirus.
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