Monday, 13 April 2020

Stumbled onto Past Pass Times: Blog in the Time of Corona



Things are boring but in a good way. I don’t know if that makes sense to anyone but me, considering boring is a negative term, but I enjoy feeling bored sometimes. There is a sense of relief, of relaxation, of rest. I have obviously had too much of said feeling, or else I wouldn’t be writing this. But I choose to cherish it, because not being bored right now would most likely mean me or someone I love would be in trouble, Boris Johnson style. I believe I have mentioned that I am quarantined with three friends in my summer house and, as much as we appreciate our work for university which obviously never got the memo about a pandemic happening, we needed to find ways to pass the time. Rather than acquiring a new skill or learning a new language, we decided to return to the comfort of past pass times. That’s the kind of good boredom I was referring to.

I, as a monad, did what I always do and started rewatching one of my favourite comedy series. This time round it was Frasier, because let’s face it, Scrubs would most likely give me medical nightmares. I have enough of those already. I must have watched 99.9% of Frasier about six times, I might even be downplaying the number. And I say 99.9% because I have only watched the very last episode once. Because the way this brain works, is that if it hasn’t been exposed to a finale it has no reason to believe the series is over. The way I have been watching Frasier is even more schizophrenic than referring to my brain as a separate entity. I am watching season one, two and three in parallel. Let me explain. I introduced a friend to Frasier, hence season one. I had some spare time to watch it myself, hence season two. Me and my friend started picking up the pace and I got worried we would catch up with myself and began season three for an extra layer of insurance. And then I liked this system.

We, as a group of four, started playing Tichu again. This is a game that is supposedly Chinese, but I haven’t met anyone Chinese that recognises it as their own. And everyone in Greece was playing Tichu for a couple of years there. It is the most racially colour-blind game ever. I won’t try to explain the rules but just know that you have a partner and two mortal enemies. And for some inexplicable reason, you tend to fight with your partner more than your rivals. Also, for some reason, it is a game best played between the hours 12-4am. That is my explanation for our messed up sleeping schedule anyway.  

There was one thing, however, that I thought I would never do again, something buried deep inside, almost forgotten. And yet, in the absence of the Internet we turned to it once more. We watched proper TV. And I mean proper. I mean commercial breaks and all. I mean waiting to see what else comes on after the program we were intentionally watching finished. I mean leaving our entertainment up to faith. I entered proper grandma mode, putting the commercials on silent, and rushing to the bathroom in order not to miss any of the action. And when I say action, I am referring to Greek period (melo)drama set in rural northern Greece, about three recently orphaned sisters with a dark secret. To perfect this analogy, my housemate kept asking that we turn up the volume because she couldn’t hear well.

On that note, we also watched a bunch of old Greek movies. Greek channels have decided that the best way to beat the covid blues is showing us the golden age of Greek cinema where the same 10 actors did all the movies. And you know what? They were right! Would these movies pass the Tomatometer today? No. God no. But, with their protective sleeve of nostalgia, they were a good distraction. The first three anyway, I think I began watching Frasier on the fourth old Greek movie. Old Greek movies inevitably lead to less old Greek movies, and these are awesome. First and foremost, because they are parodies of the aforementioned properly old Greek movies. After the four that I watched, I needed a fun take on all their faults and exaggerations. For my Greek readers (look at me, pretending my blog is widely read), I am referring to Κλάμα βγήκε από τον Παράδεισο, which is our funniest film to date. And this film was as heavily featured in our quarantine, with quotes, songs, but thankfully not fashion choices, every minute of every day. As a tribute to this unlikely inside joke, we even filmed a half-finished dance routine inspired from this movie, which will remain in deep archives; Assange wouldn’t get to them even if he tried.

This next one is a past pass time that, for some reason, I believe binds as all together. Disney films. Whoever claims they have not resorted to rewatching Aladdin, Hercules or Moana during these trying times, they are lying. And unjustifiably so. Never had the words of ‘How Far I’ll Go’ felt more personal than when we were in quarantine by the edge of the water feeling like the line where the sky meets the sea called us. I am flirting with plagiarism here. We decided to pair this trip down memory lane with the Spotify Disney playlist playing  on repeat. As I am writing this, I became painfully aware that there is probably some incriminating videos of me passionately dancing ‘Man Out of You’. I was happier not knowing.

For this last one, I did not partake. This was two of my temporary housemates. They started playing Club Penguin again. Club Penguin is what online games looked like in 2005. There is no real reason for the avatars being penguins; it is not like they have some penguin like abilities that are of use in the game. And while I am silently judging my friends for playing this I have to recognise that it is a game of 200 million accounts. But intended for children aged 6 to 14. We are 25. I think what makes this regression even worse is that they had trouble logging in. Again, intended for ages 6 to 14. And these people have degrees.

Now this is a proper blog. No point. No gain. Just a useless glimpse into our quarantine. We had a great time, we had the fortune of being detached from the rest of the world with plenty of food and wine. Now, forced to join the rest of the world in quarantine, I hope to have given some recreational ideas for people who are clearly bored, or at the very least, some opportunities to condescend and mock four people that had a great time for three worldwide hellish weeks. 

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